Movie Marathon

~Every man's memory is his private literature.

~Aldous Huxley

It's been a while. I'm not doing so hot on blogging this month. But since I just did all but one assignment for Wednesday... in less than two hours (granted, I didn't really read all of the sections in Chicago-it was like 150 pages of rules that I will look up when I need them so I can get practice understanding and applying them) I thought I'd blog some :)

I had a great weekend. Went home-as always. Honestly, I'm home so much lately. And I love it. I almost spend more nights at home than I do in my apartment. One might wonder why I don't just move home... well, there are many reasons that I don't want to get into on the internet. But I'll just say I have a love-hate relationship with my apartment and living in Provo.

I saw the new movie "Thor" on Friday... now, I'm not much for the comics and superheros and all that. It was pretty good though. But then I can't compare to anything... Sometimes it seemed to drag on a little but it was worth seeing. I was also thinking how Harry Potter comes out soon! I'm excited about that. But sad the movies will be over. Which is interesting to me because I am a book person and I hate when the turn books into movies. But I guess they did this early enough in my life that it's how it is. I had only read half the books when I saw the first movie so the characters were shaped around the characters in the movie-if that makes sense. They've just been going on so long it may just be sad.

But then, when all the movies are on DVD I'm going to have a Harry Potter movie marathon. Eight movies all in a row. It's totally on my bucket list. I'm pretty excited.

Chicago

~It is the first purpose of hope to make hopelessness bearable.

~Robert Brault

Alright, due to some not-so-fun email issues, I have been unable to get onto blogger. Finally figured them out!

Feeling pretty productive today! Ya, I got nine hours of sleep last night-which I think I needed. I was so freaking tired. I didn't get as much sleep as I normally do the last two nights and have been tired by ten the last two nights... so weird for me. Anyway, I'm almost done with tomorrow's homework and halfway through Monday's!

Is it sad that I'm beginning to love the "Chicago Manual of Style"? No, it's not fun to read. But it is so useful. I'm learning so many things! I really should probably look up if I even wrote the title right, but this is my blog and I'm not going to be a perfectionist here. I did learn this week that there should only be one space after a period. Ya, I've heard people talk about it but I didn't know it was a rule and I despise it. Eww! I like my two spaces :( It's gonna be hard to change...

I did my toe nails today! Silver glitter. Haven't done them in a few months because, well, I've been wearing socks :) Haha, and it was easier to do on my floor at home because it was cement and easy to clean, but I made it work on the kitchen floor in my apartment! I'm getting excited about wearing shorts and Crocs and flip-flops and oh my gosh! I need to stop worrying so much about my writing on here! Judge me all you want if my grammar is wrong! I'm putting all that work into my homework, okay? :)

To Shave or Not to Shave

~I have never been aware before how many faces there are. There are quantities of human beings, but there are many more faces, for each person has several.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

I debated taking a break from blogging because I've tried to be so on top of it... cuz that makes sense... but then I decided I have too much to say :) Even though I believe my journal suffers a little because of my blogging.

Alright, facial hair. I do not like it. I guess it looks alright on some people but still... I think it makes people look messy and un-kept. But that's just me. I'm honestly really glad that BYU has standards for facial hair. Though I don't agree with the allowance of mustaches... Haha, it was pretty funny (and sad) when I was actually at a computer testing lab when a guy was told he had to go shave in the restroom or go home and shave because he wasn't going to be able to take his test. Thing is, you could hardly see he had facial hair at all...

I guess I have a strong opinion about it but not tons to say. It's simple to me-I don't like it :)

Homework Homework

~The first human who hurled an insult instead of a stone was the founder of civilization.

~Sigmund Freud

One last post for April!

Oh my goodness. It's amazing how little one can get done in a day. Haha, or I could just say I have a lot of homework... ugh. My British Romantic Literature class cut back on work for the summer. My Copyediting class just doubled the amount due each day. Which I'm sure I'll be glad when I need the things I'm learning later-when I get a job. But right now... ugh.

I really have enjoyed the reading. Honestly, I really do love learning. I hate having to memorize minuet points to regurgitate on a test. When they make me do that, that's when I have no desire to really care about the subject anymore. Oh, and I really need to get myself a really good dictionary :)

I'm really glad lots of my editing homework is just based on if we do it or not. Sad thing is the only assignment I'm totally lost on is the one that will be graded. Haha, so it goes!

Oh! I got my grades from last semester! Three B's and two C-'s... not wonderful but better than I expected! My GPA goes down each semester... pulling my cumulative with it. But I only have four more to go... hmm, this could be bad.

Laundry Woes

~A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

~Robert Frost

Alright. Laundry shouldn't be that hard. You throw everything in the machine and it washes it. You go back a while later and throw it in the other machine and it dries it... Okay, folding takes forever-but that's expected.

So I go to the laundry room today and start shoving dollar bills into the slot to get quarters. 75% of the time it spit them back out at me. One time I got 3 quarters and two dollars later I got 5-so it all evened out. But it took forever! Haha, I felt kind of stupid sitting there for five minutes shoving dollars into the machine and going through the stack again and again while some other girl was doing her laundry and it was quiet.

I finally got a few quarters and claimed two machines and started loading them. The first machine started no problem. The second though... I put in the money and pushed in the slot thing and nothing happened. It ate my coins. I can always count on laundry costing two or three dollars more than it should. I was kind of freaking out inside. All my clothes were sitting in the machine with the soap and I just wasted my money. Haha, so, logically, I tried the same machine again! It worked.

I got all my dryers. I had to redo one load and, of course, every load had it's random wet spots. I spent an hour and a half folding and hanging everything and putting it away. And now... now I feel like relaxing and I have got to work on homework... and go shopping. Hmm...

Today...

~The bicycle, the bicycle surely, should always be the vehicle of novelists and poets.

~Christopher Morley

You're probably gonna hear me ramble a lot this semester-what with all the free time on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Seriously! It's almost eleven and I'm still in my pjs. Though, I have been up for two hours and I've been working on homework :)

Today I must go grocery shopping. And do my laundry. Seems the underwear supply dictates my laundry schedule... I have to do all of tomorrows homework. And Monday's homework. Haha, and maybe even start on next Wednesday's. I get these spurts of motivation. I'll be in class or something and think how I'm going to go home and get everything done! But then I walk into my room and think how nice it would be to change into sweats and get on my computer-listen to music, journal, blog, Facebook, and watch TV. How sad! Not sure I can handle constant school for the next twelve months!

Coming back to my apartment to four new roommates was weird. Still not used to it. I miss my old roommates! Sad day. I think it wouldn't be as weird if I was in a different apartment. But being in the same place with different people is what is so weird. My old roommate finished finals yesterday and we went out for ice cream :) Fun fun.

I'm actually kind of enjoying my homework so far. I'm just worried about how much I have to remember. Like, I don't want to get too far without knowing what kinds of things the teacher is looking for for us to remember... if that makes sense. Like, I have a clean slate and I don't want to start off wrong.

A Few Pics

~The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.

~Jon Stewart

Here are a few pictures from our trip to Arizona last week. I took lots but my family there didn't want to be on Facebook... so I figured a blog wouldn't be good either :)

Boz and I on our way to Swap Meet

Bronwen... her favorite past time at home was well :)

The truck my dad and brother saw when we ate lunch outside

Copyediting

So, I started my homework for my editing class. It's really interesting and kind of exciting. I don't like the idea of editing because I don't want to be at the mercy of a writer-I like to say things a certain way. But then... as a writer you're at the mercy of an editor correcting things. Just not as much so.

Anyway, I found this quote:

"a copyeditor must read the document letter by letter, word by word, with excruciating care and attentiveness. In many ways, being a copyeditor is like sitting for an English exam that never ends: At every moment, your knowledge of spelling, grammar, punctuation, usage, syntax, and diction is being tested."

-The Copyeditor's Handbook

Kind of scary comparing a career to an exam. A constant exam. But I love correcting my own work and I love making things sound and look better and make more sense :)

Spring Semester Day One

~Whoever is in a hurry shows that the thing he is about is too big for him.

~Lord Chesterfield

Everyone knows what that first day of school is like. I wan't so much nervous this semester. Honestly, I could hardly believe it was really starting all over again.

It's the checking your schedule ten times on the way to class so you don't have to have it out when you're wandering around trying to find your class-so you can pretend like you know what you're doing. Or walking into class having no idea what to expect and knowing you can't stand in the doorway too long trying to decide where to sit. Or sitting in class trying to look composed while you silently pray you are in the right classroom in the right building with the right teacher and subject. Or trying not to look to obvious as you watch everyone come in and try to remember who was in what class with you and gauging which people would be the easiest/nicest to work with on the inevitable group project.

So I have two classes this semester. It scares me just a little that that is considered full-time. I have a copy editing class at ten and a British Romanticism class at noon. Which means four straight hours of sitting in the basement of the same building-no internet, no cell phone reception, no sunlight, and it leads to me wanting to do jumping jacks in the middle of class cuz I hate sitting still that long.

Both my teachers had wonderful ratings online and they both seem great. I really think the teacher makes a big difference in a class. I think it is kind of funny but also kind of sad that, waiting for class to start, everyone was talking about what teachers in the major were good and which weren't so good-which gave lots of work and which they would never take again. But my editing teacher is known to give lots of work. I bought like six books for that class. We have a good list of homework for everyday. It's supposedly not busy work so I hope it's good.

What's getting me through is the fact that it's only a seven week semester! Amazing! And that I get Tuesdays and Thursdays off... though I feel like I have so much time I don't need to start working yet... that's probably not so good :)

Back to School

~If you're angry at a loved one, hug that person. And mean it. You may not want to hug - which is all the more reason to do so. It's hard to stay angry when someone shows they love you, and that's precisely what happens when we hug each other.

~Walter Anderson

Back to school... My classes start tomorrow. I'm not terribly excited. I think it's combined with the fact that I had a break-which made me realize how nice it was not to have school-and that I still don't even know if I passed my classes from last semester and that I have new roommates I don't know and that I miss my boyfriend...

I am excited about only having two classes-but they're two hours each and they're in the basement of the same building. I'm excited about it getting warmer so I can sit outside-but then it's been cold. Snow today!? Really?! I swear I was wearing shorts the second week of April last year. I wore them to finals. But that's Utah now, isn't it?

Had a pretty good day. Got to spend some time talking to my sister-I miss talking to her-especially without all the children interrupting and having to be corrected and whatnot. I also got to see my nephew-so cute! Got to hang out with a friend from high school who I don't see very often anymore. And then I had about two hours with my boyfriend before I had to come back... :(

It was so nice to have a few days without worrying that I was supposed to be doing homework every time I had a free minute. School isn't just school. It's a full-time all-consuming annoyance that interrupts every minute of your life! That sounds a little dramatic... haha, but it's kind of true...

Arizona

~Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything.

~Charles Kuralt

It's been a while. I spent the weekend in Arizona! Well, twelve hour drive Thursday... Twelve hour drive Sunday...

My mom's family lives there so we got to visit with them. Well, some of them. Everyone has busy schedules so we didn't get to see them all. I'd totally post pictures but everyone was opposed to being on Facebook so I didn't figure an unprotected blog would be okay either...

We usually do the same things when we go-but it's about being with the family. We always to go swap meet-haha, we usually end up going in the middle of the day-which is so hot! I got an MP3 Player-hopefully I don't break this one too... but if I do it was pretty cheap so it won't be as big of a deal. My parents got me a taser for when I walk back to my apartment at night. It makes me feel better that I'll have it if I need it-but even just the sound scares me.

We also spent several hours at the mall. Maybe it's just cuz they're somewhere else, but the malls in Arizona are so much cooler than ours are here. Haha, and we ate so much. And not always the most healthy. I almost never drink soda either-but I had a lot this weekend... Haha, but I justify such things because I was on vacation.

Two days goes so fast! It seems like we'd just gotten there when we left. But that's how it always goes. Twelve hour car rides? Not my favorite. And I'm never even the one driving. I get motion sick if I try to do anything except sit and stare out the window. And sleeping is just not comfortable in the backseat of a truck. Pretty sure I pulled a neck muscle :) It seems like a dream that we went-but it was a lot of fun :)

7:00 AM Finals

~The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

~Jean Kerr

I am not a morning person. I'm gonna say that's why I was singing and dancing to myself this morning...

7:00 am finals should be banned. I rolled out of bed, put on some levis, put my hair in a pony tale, and headed to campus. I didn't even care that I didn't have makeup on :) Just over an hour for my essay test. I feel like I did alright-besides forgetting one of the author's names. Oh, so, we have stadium seating in that class. 55 students. I normally get to sit without anyone on either side of me. Which can suck when you have to discuss something with a partner, but is nice when you need to focus.

So this guy walks in fifteen minutes late. And of all the seats he decides to take it's right next to me. Ugh. It's because of people like him that I don't study in the library anymore. The constant fidgeting, almost dropping his papers every five minutes. I swear in the more than 45 minutes he sat by me he wrote one paragraph. I'm not judging. I can b.s.-thank goodness. But I just stress about someone sitting next to me and looking around or not working. Like they are paying attention to what I'm doing.

And then, the whole stadium seating thing is great and all except when you finish your test before the people on the outsides of your row and you're sitting right in the middle. I had to climb over people to get out. But then, it wasn't as bad as I expected.

So now I have one more final. And I cannot focus one bit. I just want to get it over with. It really will be a miracle if I pass. Just finished mapping out the seven tenses in French. Ugh. Too many conjugations. That's what gets me. And honestly, this test is going to be a lot of guessing. But that's how they all are. And somehow I managed to pass the last two semesters...

I've cleaned the fridge and scrubbed my room. I'm basically packed. I just need to vacuum, wipe down the kitchen table and chairs, take stuff out to my car, and fill out the paper for cleaning checks. And then I'm home-free for six days!

Google Doc

~found a great poem about finals week... but it said it had a copyright... so I didn't want to copy it. But you can Google "Ode to Finals Week"-it's by Sarah :)

The Google Doc is amazing to me. I hadn't really used them much until this semester and several of my classes are using them for study guides. Don't know what I'd do without them... oh ya, look up all the information myself... or not. My notes don't cover as much as other people-especially those with computers.

But it's such a weird thing to be reading a document and have some brightly colored cursor pop up and start typing words on your screen. Just now someone highlighted a whole bunch... for a minute I was afraid they would erase everything!

I'm super worried I won't be able to get up at 6:15 for my final at 7. I can just see myself waking up at nine and realizing I missed it. Ugh, that does not sound like fun.

Cleaning

~We labor to make a house a home, then every time we're expecting visitors, we rush to turn it back into a house.

~Robert Brault

Alright. Two finals down. Two to go. Haven't studied one bit for the last two. Oh my.

I took Elang today-didn't do so great. But I'll pass the class. Pretty sure...

Just spent an hour wiping down everything in my room with Clorox wipes. Thank goodness for those! Haha, except now my hands feel really dry. My room feels cleaner... but it looks no different. Sad day. I'm mostly worried about doing my chore around the apartment and having it stay clean until checks on Saturday...

Can't believe we're more than halfway through April. Or that today is my last full day with these roommates. Tomorrow I'll take two finals, clean my apartment, and head home for a week. When I come back I will have five new roommates-none of which I even know their names. Kinda scary.

Oh, and my visiting teachers came by! Honestly, visiting teaching hasn't been my favorite thing. Such scheduling issues and whatnot. But I really needed that today-someone to talk to and have them listen. Someone who I don't know very well so we can talk about what I'm majoring in and when I graduate. Sometimes, that's just nice.

Why Finals?

~Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.

~Jack Handy

I'm not sure I understand Finals.

They give us extra days without class just to cram everything we should have been studying all semester. And that's just what it is. Cramming. Today I'll be cramming for three different finals. And yes, by Thursday I won't remember a thing. But the schools have set it up like that.

My British Lit class had rolling finals. Every two weeks we'd have a few questions on what we'd learned. Haha, and then I was free to forget it! Honestly, I know I'd be failing that class without those. Actually, still worried about failing... sad day.

Ugh. Finals week is just depressing.

It doesn't help that tuition for next semester is due today. That white glove cleaning checks are this week. So glad I'm not moving out this week too. I should probably do my laundry and I really need to go shopping. But that's life.

You Know

"You know you're in love when you can say anything to the person and you know they won't laugh at you. When you can see their face when you close your eyes. When you can still feel their arms around you holding you tight long after they are gone. When you can still taste their kiss after you have said goodbye. You can tell you're in love when you miss them before they are gone. When their voice lingers in your ears. When their presence eases any pain. When their name sends chills down your spine. When they are the only thing you can think about. You know you are in love when you can see all their hopes and dreams and their soul when you look into their eyes. When they call you at four in the morning to say, "I love you" and mean it. When your tears stain not only their shirt, but also their heart. When they are hurt just because of these tears. When even a simple chore done with them can become a lasting memory. Ultimately, you know you are in love when you can't imagine living without them, and can't figure how did you live before you knew them. When they fulfill every need and without them you are incomplete. The love of someone else completes the heart, and sound and mind all at once."

No Quotes

I've been searching for a quote that fits how I'm feeling perfectly. But I can't find one.

And then I realized I'm an English Major. I should write it.

And then I realized I don't want to feel it. And I don't want to relive it a million times to figure out the right metaphor.

And then I realized no one reads this, so it doesn't really matter what I write.

But here it is. Simply. Sometimes I hope for too much. Expect too much. Believe too much.

Rain Reminds Me...

I was thinking it was weird that walking to campus in the pouring rain today reminded me of Disneyland. The smell, the feeling, the umbrella, the being wet... but then, our last trip to Disneyland was a wet one. It was a unique experience though-and a lot of fun :)

This is pretty much what we looked like the whole time.

Except when we were undercover and didn't need the umbrellas. (I swear when we got back I felt weird not carrying an umbrella everywhere)

This is what we resorted to when we couldn't find rain boots.

My feet were still wet-I just had a harder time feeling it!

(and they weren't as soggy)

Don't worry. Everyone else looked the same :)

Looking at the blue sky in California Adventure...

Day one of my finals

~America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.

~Laurence J. Peter

April showers bring May flowers. April showers bring May flowers. Right? I do love rain but the warm weather has been so nice!

One final down three to go.

I went home for reading days and the first day of finals... Wednesday night through Sunday night. It was so hard to come back to Provo. But at least I'll be headed home again in 48 hours! Can't wait.

The problem with Finals Weeks is that I feel like I should always be studying. I feel so guilty if I'm not. This morning I slept in, went to move my car and get my backpack, studied, showered, studied, watched a show, studied, paid my credit card bill, wrote a missionary, watched a TV episode, and headed to the WILK to take my D&C final.

It wasn't too bad really. I have a hard time with some of the people and places. I'm fine with events and doctrine and all that. Oh, and when it just asks what a certain section is about... not good at that. I got a B though! Granted, it was my easiest final... so I'm a little worried about the rest. I was looking at my GPA from SLCC and BYU and my estimated GPA for this semester... I'm getting worse and worse :/

High School

I found a website with lots of longer quotes. They have been so interesting to read. I found this one about high school and thought I'd share it.

I didn't have a ton of friends in high school. And we haven't kept in touch very well. Thank goodness for Facebook... I was kind of the weird quiet girl who always did her work and always went to class. I was surprised when people knew who I was.

By my last semester of high school I'd started sluffing a little. I'd gone to all the football games that fall and hung out with friends until midnight. I'd go to class and talk or pass notes or text or listen to music or lay my head down to sleep. It was a thrill to do what I wasn't really supposed to do. My friends helped me to not take things so seriously. And school started to become for fun.

I did well in high school. I got good grades, never went to attendance school, never got sent to the office... I was in several clubs, on the literary magazine staff, English Sterling Scholar, and I got my Associates Degree when I was 17. But those weren't the things I learned the most from. And while I wouldn't want to go back and do it all again. Heavens no. I am grateful for all the things I did learn and all the times I'll remember :)

"Somewhere between the procrastination... and the homework... and the incessant forwards... and the friendships... and the calls to each other complaining about crushes... Somewhere between the phone calls to old friends... And the "I miss yours, the "I love yours, and the "What are we doing tonight?"... And somewhere between all of the changing and growing... Somewhere between the classes... And the skipping classes... And the studying for tests... And the pretending to study for tests... And the downright NOT studying for tests... I forgot... I forgot what high school is all about. I forgot what it meant to cry... I forgot that pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy... And that pretending to be smart doesn't make you smart... I forgot that you can't just forget the past in fear of the future... I forgot that you can't control falling in love... And that you can't make yourself fall in love... I learned that I can love... I learned that it's okay to mess up... And it's okay to ask for help... And it's okay to feel like crap... I learned it's okay to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day... I learned that sometimes the things you want most you just can't have. I learned that the greatest thing about high school isn't the parties or the drinking or the hook-ups... It's the friendships, which means taking chances... I learned that sometimes the things we want to forget are the things which we most need to talk about... I learned that letters from friends are the most important things... And that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better. But, basically, I just learned that my friends... Both old and new... Are the most important people to me in the world. AND... without them, I wouldn't be who I am today. So this is a thank you to all of my friends... For always being there. And even if we're not on good terms or we have lost touch... I still care for you... Always and forever love all you guys."

This Problem...

~He who fails to plan, plans to fail.

~Proverb quotes

I have this problem. I like to know things. I like to know what's going on and what's going to happen. Exactly what's going to happen.

There are many things in my life that I see are teaching me to be more flexible. My sophomore year of high school I had a carpool to dance three days a week. We were on time maybe 25% of the time. I would sit in the backseat anxious to get there-especially because I still had to change into my leotard and put on my pointe shoes most of the time. But I was a little more okay with being ten minutes late by the end of the year. This was also the carpool that got me into country music.

I have a to do list. As anyone who knows me would know. I have several calenders and I plan everything out. When I plan something I stress over all the little details. I was an FHE group leader last year and learned further to let some things go.

But now I still struggle. I have a spontaneous boyfriend-which I love, but sometimes it kills me not to know plans. And other specific situations that I probably shouldn't share over the internet-that I am having a hard time planning my life around. Things I never know-yes or no-about. I know, let's just be vague today, but that's the way it is.

Perfect

"Congratulations! You're not perfect! It's ridiculous to want to be perfect anyway. But then, everybody's ridiculous sometimes, except perfect people. You know what perfect is? Perfect is not eating or drinking or talking or moving a muscle or making even the teensiest mistake. Perfect is never doing anything wrong - which means never doing anything at all. Perfect is boring! So you're not perfect! Wonderful! Have fun! Eat things that give you bad breath! Trip over your own shoelaces! Laugh! Let somebody else laugh at you! Perfect people never do any of those things. All they do is sit around and sip weak tea and think about how perfect they are. But they're really not one-hundred-percent perfect anyway. You should see them when they get the hiccups! Phooey! Who needs 'em? You can drink pickle juice and imitate gorillas and do silly dances and sing stupid songs and wear funny hats and be as imperfect as you please and still be a good person. Good people are hard to find nowadays. And they're a lot more fun than perfect people any day of the week."

Half-way...

~Trust your own instinct. Your mistakes might as well be your own, instead of someone else's. ~Billy Wilder

This post is my 101st post this year. That is how many posts I wrote last year. I think it's pretty awesome that in three and a half months I've written as much as I wrote in ten and a half months last year :)

I am now half-way through my paper! And it's only six o'clock. Haha, but I shouldn't jinx it... I want to get it done and out of the way. But I know after this I start six days of studying. And I really don't want to go there.

So on my last British rolling final today the last question was about what our favorite piece of writing was from the semester. For that class, it was hard enough to find one remembered let alone liked at all. But then we had to explain why we liked it based on literary aspects and conventions and whatnot-nothing "touchy-feely." I can understand that. But I also found it a little strange. Because generally I don't like something because of it's literary aspects. Maybe I'm just crazy. I don't know. It wasn't "What was the most important thing you learned?" or "What do you wish we had done differently?" or anything like that. It was just odd to me.

Unforum

~There are short-cuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them.

~Vicki Baum

Yay! Done with British Literary History... as long as I pass. Took my last rolling final today-which everyone should do, it was so nice. I would have no chance of passing without that. We took part of the final-5 questions-every two or three weeks. So there's no cramming at the end and no worrying during finals week. Turned in my final research paper today. And I actually feel like I did a good job. It's been written for almost two weeks and I've actually had time to edit it :) And I managed to recite the first 18 lines of the prologue to "The Canterbury Tales" in Middle English! I feel so accomplished.

Now I have four class periods left and one paper to write. But I now have the introductory paragraph and all my sources. Now I just need to learn to focus. I'm slightly intimidated by my many days of studying ahead. Because I can't focus that long and I am not a good studier. I'd rather glance over the information for two minutes and take the test-which is something I know I'll regret. But I'm headed home for three days to study during the day and take breaks at night. Rather than just sit in my apartment and watch movies in between everything.

Oh! The BYU un-forum was today! It was pretty good. I really enjoyed it last year and was excited to go this time. But watching the clubs perform made me miss dancing. And performing. All the hours of practice and sweat and blood and tears-literally. Getting sick of the music and unconsciously going through steps in your head or with your feet all day. I miss looking out at an audience from the stage and the bright lights on my face and the makeup and hair spray and itchy costumes. The nervousness and restlessness. I miss it all.

The last time I performed was almost two years ago now. In front of a full Conference Center in Salt Lake City. And it was such a wonderful experience. The long early morning practices and the dance style I wasn't used to. It was all so fun! I wish I cold go back. Or have an opportunity to do something like that now-days. But I'm not good enough for a college team. Nor would I want to spend all my time doing that. I just want to dance.

Counting My Blessings

~The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change.

~Eng's Principle

Counting my blessings today. I drove back to Provo Sunday morning and as I pulled onto my street my car started making this strange noise. To me it sounded like something was boiling in the engine, but kind of metal-ish. Hard to explain.

I had to park in a parking lot I'm not supposed to park in during the week so after church I moved my car. And called my dad. Seems like there's always a problem to fix. He had me start the car so he could listen but he said it was too bad and to turn it off. I was kind of worried but I knew he could fix it. I felt bad he'd have to come here to do it though.

So this afternoon my dad and my boyfriend came to look at my car. Thank goodness they know cars. Something with a belt and bearing and whatnot. The belt was ripped. They told me if it had come apart when I was driving the car wouldn't have worked. I barely made it back to my apartment. I can't even imagine what I would have done if that had happened on the road.

It took about three hours and both of them working to fix it. And I just have to say, I do not understand cars. Haha, not at all. I couldn't even tell what tools were what to help out! How sad.

We went to dinner and they headed back. And now I have to get started on my final paper for American Lit. Been dreading it. It is 20% of my grade. Ugh. But if I can get everything done I will have less to worry about when I go home in less than two days! In my car that now works!

Privilege Checklist

~All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing.

~Maurice Maeterlinck

Lately I've been driving back to Provo late at night. I'll go home for an evening or head back late Sunday night. And parking in Provo sucks. As if I haven't said that a million times already on my blog... sorry 'bout that. I don't think they should be allowed to build more buildings than they have parking for. But that's a whole issue I don't want to go into right now.

I'm a girl. I've been taught to be careful-especially in the dark. I've seen hundreds of CSI, NCIS, Bones, Criminal Minds, and other TV shows about kidnappings and murders. And all kinds of horrific things. I'm not stupid. I know these things happen. And it scares me. It really does.

A few months ago my dad got me a nice thing of pepper spray. When I walk home late at night, I have it with me-usually out, ready to spray. With my phone in my other hand. I freak out at every noise and avoid anyone who happens to be walking around as well.

Talking to my parents about it this last week I remembered an article/paper that I read for my college humanities class my senior year of high school. Luckily, I loved that text book and kept it. I wanted to share a few things from it. It's called "The Male Privilege Checklist" ("An unabashed imitation of an article by Peggy McIntosh).

To preface, I'm not overly upset or feminist or bitter or anything else you could think of. I just find these points interesting and find it kind of sad that this is the way things are. Further, the checklist had a preface about how they are not saying men have easy lives either.

---------------------------

4-If I fail in my job or career, I can feel sure this won't be seen as a black mark against my entire sex's capabilities.

7-If I'm a teen or adult, and if I can stay out of prison, my odds of being raped are relatively low.

8-I am not taught to fear walking alone after dark in average public places.

12-If I have children and a career, no one will think I'm selfish for not staying at home.

21-If I'm careless with my financial affairs it won't be attributed to my sex.

22-If I'm careless with my driving it won't be attributed to my sex.

26-My clothing is typically less expensive and better-constructed than women's clothing for the same social status. While I have fewer options, my clothes will probably fit better than a woman's without tailoring.

27-The grooming regimen expected of me is relatively cheap and consumes little time.

33-My ability to make important decisions and my capability in general will never be questioned depending on what time of the month it is.

46-I have the privilege of being unaware of my male privilege.

Check List

~A college education shows a man how little other people know.

~Thomas Chandler Haliburton

Sometimes I struggle to make posts long enough. What I mean long enough? I hate when the pictures on the side of the blog are longer than the posts... if that makes sense. So I try to maintain regular sized posts :)

Laundry-washed and dried: CHECK

Clean Room: CHECK

All Online French Homework for the Semester: CHECK

All British Literary History Reading for the Semester: CHECK

All D&C Homework for the Semester: CHECK

Man, I didn't realize how much I have done! I just have one paper to write, one paper to revise, one poem to memorize, the Canterbury Tales intro to memorize, one more story to read, and all my test to get ready for.

Alright, that sounds like a lot I have to do still...

Really I'm just struggling with the papers. They take hours. I don't even want to start. Again, dumb since I'm an English major :/ But my current plan is to just get everything done tonight that I can and maybe have Monday and Tuesday to write and the rest of the week to study... ya, I need to start tonight. Curses.

Spring Cleaning

~In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt.

~Margaret Atwood

Today has been kind of a bad day. I am not about to share details as to why over the internet. But I will share what I did about, or in spite of, or because of it. I guess I kind of noticed, looking back, that when I get these seemingly random urges to clean are when I feel down in the dumps.

After I thought about that for a while it occurred to me that maybe I feel the need to control something. And throwing things out and organizing helps. And then I can go back and enjoy the fruits of such bad days in the cleanliness of my room!

So I got rid of two grocery sacks full of trash... where the heck did all that come from?! And I loaded up two boxes of things to take home because I don't need them here. And I figure all of this is good timing because cleaning check is this Saturday! Well, not that they really check. I swear our apartment will be just as messy the day after cleaning checks as before-and not cuz we mess it up quickly.

Also, I have a close parking spot! Right behind the building-not even in the parking lot across the street! Which is crazy, cuz I didn't get home until midnight last night. I'd pretty much given up on getting a parking spot even remotely close that late at night. I'm kind of glad I at least looked in the lot-I almost didn't.

Oh, and I decided to sluff French this morning! Just had to put that in here. Because it's probably the last time this semester and it makes me happy! Last week I only sluffed one class... this week it's two so far. *sigh* it's that close to the end of the semester...

Laundry Day

~What a lot we lost when we stopped writing letters. You can't reread a phone call.

~Liz Carpenter

What I really need to do is write in my journal. And while that is on my list of things to do, catching up all the way is a lot harder than catching up my blog. Not sure why I felt the need to write that...

So, it's laundry day. Yuck. No, laundry isn't that bad. And I got all my machines today when I needed them. It's a matter of getting everything dry. I admit, they were big loads. I wait until I really need to do laundry before I do. When I brought everything back to my room and spent an hour hanging and folding everything I found random wet parts. A damp sleeve, a damp section of pants, the towels were just generally damp... I even put on my sweats and they're all dry except the pockets-so I turned them inside-out and looked weird for a while!

I attempted to dry everything by hanging it around my room... I usually have a shirt or skirt that I drip-dry and they're more wet than these things... but after two and a half hours and absolutely no improvement, I got sick of my small room covered in wet stuff. So I spent the fifty cents and put in another load.

I am just glad I'm on the bottom floor and the laundry room is just around the corner. Cuz it would suck to have to go up and down all those stairs over and over again with clothes...

Luckiest People

~It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see.

~Henry David Thoreau

Haha, I know I've been blogging a lot but I got behind last weekend and, you guessed it, I'm going home again this weekend and will probably get behind again.

But I don't seem to have much else to say today so I wanted to share a video :) I saw this a few weeks ago and thought it was pretty awesome-especially the car going through traffic...

Six Days Left... and counting

~Poetry is man's rebellion against being what he is.

~James Branch Cabell

*sigh* the end of the semester is upon us. Not to say I'm not excited, but I'm feeling kind of doomed. Just, my grades aren't looking so hot. And at this point in the semester all you can really do is study hard for the final. And I am not a test-taker, to say the least. Oh, and write amazing final essays, which, if you read my previous post you know I am struggling with :)

But I will try not to be a downer! At least not until finals week...

I got to take a nap today! Well, I probably shouldn't have but it was so nice! Haha, except that I forgot to put my retainer in before I fell asleep... and now my teeth have moved. So I'm wearing it now. Seriously, braces and retainers are insane. They are such a good idea-seriously, I'm so grateful that they got rid of the giant gap between my two front teeth. But why must teeth move back to where they were so easily?

Devotional was good-last of the semester... except for the un-forum next week!!! I'm looking forward to that! It was really good last year. Though, and not to be negative, I have a word for all the excessively lovey-dovey couples: if you're not gonna listen, if you're just gonna whisper and cuddle and generally be annoying-don't come! I want to listen!

Alright, I'll stop myself there. I remember how I felt last year about the couples all over campus. And while I can understand now, it's no less annoying when you are in a relationship yourself.

Also, I really enjoyed being able to talk to people in my English class today for over a half hour. We were talking about our final essays, but we only had so much to say. I miss having a social life at school. That is one thing I miss about high school. Though, I kind of felt like I had something to prove-I really need to pick a favorite author and time period and all kinds of other things to sound legit...

Dear Essay...

Dear five-paragraph essay of my public education,

You suck. Yes, you made it so easy to write an essay in middle and high school. Though, you were very redundant and boring you helped fill the pages. But you are now a terrible thing for me to be used to and I detest that fact.

Eighth grade. Mr. Richardson's US History class. Fall of 2004. That's when I learned "Say what you're going to say. Say it. Say it again." Such a simple concept. Of course it had to be too simple, huh?

Now I sit in my college classes trying to figure out how to write an essay. Yep, I'm an English major. Ya, apparently I still don't know how to write an essay. It is a very sad fact. One that I must cope with.

How to make a clear, pointed thesis statement without saying what I'm going to say? How do I not make it redundant? How did I get through all these years assuming the thesis statement always goes at the end of the first paragraph? Well, okay, we learned about thesis statements one day when I missed school. Maybe that's why I have such problems...

Conference Weekend :)

~We exaggerate misfortune and happiness alike. We are never as bad off or as happy as we say we are.

~Honore de Balzac

Alright, it's been a few days. And despite the fact that I really should be doing my homework... as always... I decided to blog. I had a wonderful weekend! Friday I went camping with my boyfriend, his siblings, and some friends. Camping has never been my favorite thing. I don't remember going when I was younger and my family's only gone two or three times in the last, well, as long as I can remember. So most of my experience has been from girl's camp and youth conference. It's always been fun. I just hate feeling dirty and having greasy hair and not wearing make-up when I feel like I should. Oh, and I have this thing about people washing their hands-especially when we don't have a real bathroom around.

But I have to admit, it was lots of fun. It was almost dark by the time go got there and we started a fire. Pretty much, I froze the entire time. But we ate and talked and told stories and got the people next to us to stop making noise at one in the morning and were visited by the cops and stayed up until three... But of course the best part was going with my boyfriend!

Saturday we went jeeping in the morning and listened to General Conference on our way home :) I love Conference weekend!!! And it was amazing this time-haha, as always. I'm excited to read them all again... alright, and the few I slept through cuz I don't sleep well camping. I got home from school today and listened to three talks!

Besides that I visited with my family and spent time with my boyfriend and dreaded coming back to school... haha, only seven more days of class though! Two more papers. Five finals. And SIX days off before Spring Semester! Ah, part of me can't believe it's already April. The other part of me feels like it's about time :)

MeSS oF STuFF

~Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.

~Gil Stern

Alright, here we go. I've had about a million things I wanted to say on here all day and I was too focused on getting crap done to let myself stop and write. I am so happy right now. Haha, ya, I just realized I have another paper to write by Wednesday... which I can't start until Monday. But hey, that's life. And right now I'm done with just about everything that has to be done through Monday's classes! And I'm excited about this weekend: camping and General Conference!

Let's see... I think it is pretty dang funny how many people on campus STILL have pink hair from the Festival of Colors last Saturday :) Maybe it's good I didn't go the week after I got my hair dyed... I was also pretty amazed at all the people out on campus today. Haha, it's like the weather gets warm and all these people show up! Where have they been all semester? I bet the library wasn't very full today. It was so nice out! And... that's about as warm as I want it to get. Especially walking around campus with a heavy backpack all summer. But it made me happy!

So, my day... I slept in! Yep, until nine. And then I sluffed French. It was just a review for the test and they went over the practice test I was supposed to do last night but instead I went home to spend time with my boyfriend. So glad I did too-even and maybe especially with all the stress this week :) So I worked on my British Literary History paper and read a little American Literary History and actually ate breakfast... at like 11. Zoned out through British Lit and exchanged rough drafts. I headed over to the testing center and sat outside to study French.

Now, I knew this morning that it was sunny outside and that I was going to try to study outside. And I realized I'd left my sunglasses in my car. Which wouldn't have been a problem except I had to park down my street across a busy street and didn't feel like walking there. I underestimated how sensitive my eyes are. I swear it they weren't like this until last summer... I never understood people wearing sunglasses all the time. But then, I never understood the chapstick thing either and now I'm completely addicted. So I just might spend this summer in sunglasses...

Oh, one more thing. I've said it before, but headphones are an amazing invention. Use them! Seriously! I understand wanting to crank up the music and get lost in the noise or dance around the room. But I don't do that in my apartment with five roommates. I just think it's inconsiderate. But then, maybe I should have just gone to the library-there are just plenty of rude people there-on their phones, flirting, coughing, sneezing, talking, generally being annoying... I had earplugs though! And that helped! So I'm alright :)

Not Long Enough

Dear Blog Readers,

Is it worrisome that I want to be a writer and can't seem to write a five page paper given an entire day? It worries me. I now have two pages written. Double-spaced. And two hours left tonight to do it. I can just see that my points are not strong enough. And it's the spending hours online searching for articles that prove my point or that I could argue with that gets to me :( I really only have one good article. I'm comforted by the fact that it's only a rough draft due Thursday and that everyone around me in class was talking about how they hadn't started and hadn't even thought about what they were going to write about. So maybe I won't be the only one in my group who doesn't have a clear argument or a full five page paper.

Different Standards?

~When most people see an adult skipping they assume it must be on the way either to or from the asylum.

~Terri Guillemets

Here I sit. Trying to write the research paper that has plagued my life for over three weeks. The one that's due Thursday. That is 20% of my final grade. And I'm searching the internet for critical papers about any relatively short thing we read for class... or just one I read at all. I actually found several articles for a play we read. And I was pretty excited it might work. And I start reading... is it just me or have we always had to introduce the work we are writing on along with the author? Isn't that expected? Maybe I missed something. Because none of these papers have the author. And some of them don't quite sound like the play we read. But I can't tell. They jump into the play without even introducing it. I'm finding it a little frustrating.

Beyond that, I was just thinking how much easier my D&C paper was. Partly because I know the material better and it didn't have to have an argumentative thesis. But also because all my research was easy. I went to lds.org and typed in topics and found talks. Full-text talks right on the screen that I could copy passages out of or print if I wanted. On the library website I have to search, not get anything I want, click on a million links, hope they have a full text, only get a picture version, and refer back and forth from the internet to my document to copy out a quote. Basically, another frustrating aspect of school.

In French today we talked with a partner about our summer plans. Several trips to other countries, going home for the summer, whatnot... I'm staying here for school. My teacher actually called on me and asked about my plans. I forgot how to use the future tense. He said something about my being courageous to stay both spring and summer. I didn't mention I hadn't gone to school in the fall. But some days I think I'm crazy for staying. I know I have to for my scholarship, but still. I'm already getting burned out after my 8 month break from school. Kind of scary.

Anyway, I must get back to my paper. And I have to go grocery shopping today. I'm out of shampoo, staples, just about all my food... my bagels molded yesterday. ~sigh~

Furthermore

~I still get wildly enthusiastic about little things.... I play with leaves. I skip down the street and run against the wind. I never water my garden without soaking myself.

~Leo F. Buscaglia

To add to my last post concerning things I've given up on... clean dishes, an empty sink, a kitchen that smells good, a floor I can walk across without getting food stuck to my socks, and a door I can keep locked. Among other things :)

Let's see, it's only been a few hours. I know. I realized all my homework from here on out this week consists of one sixty page play, one regular assignment, three papers, two tests, and memorization. Not things that are easy to get done quickly... or to every really be done with-or done studying for.

*sigh* 24 hours ago I was home... I wish I could go back... no, that's not true. Cuz I was getting ready to leave then. No, I want to skip to Friday! Camping, Conference, family, clean house, sleeping in, a guaranteed parking spot, and, best of all, spending time with my boyfriend. I just have this feeling it's gonna be a long week.

For FHE we watched a really good video about a blue vase. I think that's the title too... it was worth watching. This guy spends hours trying to buy a blue vase because he gave his word. Just watching him I got frustrated with his task. I think I would have given up. Which is sad. But I think it's the truth. Haha, just look at me with my homework right about now. So looking forward to shorter semesters this summer and maybe a three-day weekend or two...

Anywayz, if you haven't seen the Kid History episodes on YouTube you should totally look them up! They're pretty funny. This one is probably the best and number one is pretty good too :)

Given Up... For Now

~We feel free when we escape - even if it be but from the frying pan into the fire.

~Eric Hoffer

I think it's time to admit I've given up. Yep, given up. At least for now. On having a clean apartment. On having milk in the fridge more than a week out of each month. Or having bread... at all. Feeling comfortable in my own apartment... Some days just feel like a repeat of the last. Everything is so much the same when I'm in Provo. Makes my weekdays so hard to get through.

This week is stressful. But then, I can try to get it all done. And it probably will be done. And by the end I won't give a darn about my grades. Which is sad. Because as best as I can figure, my grades are absolutely horrible right now. And with two weeks left, they aren't likely to go up all that much. Which scares me. I do not want to re-take French or British Literary History. They are, in fact, my two worst classes... and, consequently, the two I am mostly likely to fail. Sad day.

Four of fifteen classes done this week. Eleven of about a million assignments. Zero out of three tests. Zero out of three papers. Less than 94 hours till I go home again. 94 hours... such a long time. And yet not enough to get everything done that I know I need to.

I drove around my block for twenty minutes last night. Trying to find a parking spot. I know I talk about it a lot, but it bugs me to no end. And the "overflow" area (at least in my opinion) had construction cones along the road. I hate feeling like I've been left with no options. And when I do find a parallel parking spot... my car is usually too long to fit. Darn station wagon :)

Anyway, there's my random schpil for today!

Grammar

~The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.

~H.L. Mencken

Yes, I've blogged a lot today. I am trying to get ahead for the weekend, but it's also been a long day. Seriously lacking motivation. I have a good draft of my D&C paper to work on and I've started my ELANG homework. Oh, grammar. I've actually kind of enjoyed this class lately because it's finally having some actual application to life!

This week we are learning about cohesion. Sentences should never start with something that hasn't been discussed before. Only the title can really do that. So they should go A:B, B:C... or A:B, A:C... Which makes sense but is wholly frustrating. Because that is not how people write. And yes, it makes things more clear, but then it also makes writing and editing extremely difficult. Things can be understandable without being like this. Yes, it is a common problem-look up just about any article online. Textbooks are great at using all the grammatical problems we discuss in class. See, even in this blog I am not following this rule...

People aren't stupid. Well... haha, most people can figure out simple connections between thoughts and concepts. They don't need everything spelled out for them. It is making my homework difficult! Haha, I just might go back to writing my papers :) How sad.

Train of Thought

I love looking at pictures. I love seeing people smiling back. Most often they are some of the happiest moments of our lives. Some of the most memorable. Yet maybe without them we'd forget. Forget the details. Because there is always so much going on in life. So many things that it's hard to keep track. Even of the happy things. Because life is overwhelming. And the happy things pass so easily. And the hard things take over our thoughts. They take longer to sort out. They are the things we need to worry about. And somehow, worry takes precedence in our minds. Precedence over the happy things that drift lazily through our thoughts-when we know we should be focused on all those worries. It's a never-ending, depressing cycle. That we all go through. Maybe not all of us. And if not, I envy the people who don't experience it. Wouldn't that be the life?

Papers, papers...

~Always jump in the puddles! Always skip alongside the flowers. The only fights worth fighting are the pillow and food varieties.

~Terri Guillemets

I am having the hardest time focusing. Stupid thing is, I only had one class today. And all I really have to do is write two papers. I think the problem is that my options are so wide. I want to get all the research I can and write the best papers... thus I feel overwhelmed and have barely started. Even though I'm excited about my D&C paper.

I know that I'll have to write my three final research papers eventually. They have to be done. Just like every other bit of homework that I get every day of my life! And I know how good I'll feel when I'm done. Which is why I don't understand why I can't just sit down and write them! What the heck?!

Partly I feel like I have plenty of time. I got home from school at eleven today. I had 13 hours to work on homework. It is now four and I've managed to do some French and some things that I want to do. I am trying to work out a schedule for this fall and praying my account won't have a hold on it when I register next week because I haven't done my ecclesiastical endorsement...

I think I'm really starting to give up on this semester... 14 days left of class! In a month I'll be on my "Spring Break" in between semesters! I'm so excited!

The Canterbury Tales

Alright, so I have this irritating British Literary History class this semester, right? Well, I have to memorize the first 18 lines of The Canterbury Tales in Middle English. Haha, is it sad that I don't even know what it's saying?!

I've been working on this for several weeks and have 12 lines memorized-though I'm not so sure about my pronunciation... I have to recite this for my teacher next week... I'm pretty worried.

Pretty sure this is one of the videos my teacher told us might help us... oh my! (it has more than 18 lines)

Naps!

~I have always a sacred veneration for anyone I observe to be a little out of repair in his person, as supposing him either a poet or a philosopher.

~Jonathan Swift

Ah! Took a two hour nap that I hadn't planned on... guess I was pretty tired. And now it's already seven and I haven't even started my two research papers! But I think I needed that :) I was really really tired trying to do my homework earlier. Haha, and maybe the earplugs had something to do with it being peaceful enough for me to fall asleep.

I love naps. Ya, I chunk of my day is gone when I sleep for two or three hours. But many times it's worth it. I feel like I can jump back into homework-at least a little bit. And maybe I can stay up a little later because I had a little more sleep earlier.

Man, this post is sounding like my writing for school! It's corrupting me! Like the other day I was at the store and reading a sentence in the newspaper and I was parsing it out in my head and trying to figure out if the modifier was in the right place... how sad. Though that may be good-getting practice and what not. Haha, but now even when I write in my journal I am more careful about subject length and modifier placement. Kind of sad that kind of practice isn't what's going to help me on my final...

My Mini Spring Break

~The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.
~Joseph Campbell

In honor of BYU's lacking a spring break, I took a day off school! Yes, a Tuesday. Yes, I only had one class that day anyway. And yes, I only went home. But it was such a good day and a half! Sometimes I hate the feeling of missing something I should be at... but sometimes it feels liberating!

I went home Monday afternoon. It was so windy that I ended up flying kites at the park with my boyfriend! I don't remember the last time I flew a kite. Thus, I was unprepared for when the ridiculously strong wind (which I had battled the hour drive home on the freeway) pulled the kite out of my hand effectively giving me a rope burn across my finger. A nice white line across the part where my finger bends. It stung for a while. But it was also a lot of fun once we got the smaller kite going!

Tuesday I slept in, talked to my sister, held my nephew, did some homework, and spent time with my boyfriend. And hated coming back to Provo even though I'll be home in two days for the whole weekend! It was SO worth going home! And now I only have two days left this weekend, three weeks left this semester. Haha, and I'm having such a hard time finding motivation. THIS is why BYU needs at least a three or four day weekend for a break. Weekends aren't enough. One day off isn't enough. AH! I think it will be something I forever resent.

Oh my grades...

~You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear. Do it! Develop an appreciation for the present moment. Seize every second of your life and savor it. Value your present moments. Using them up in any self-defeating ways means you've lost them forever.

~Wayne Dyer

I know I'm supposed to be working on homework. Haha, especially considering the topic of this post! So, I was looking at my grades this semester-what with there only being three weeks left of class... Well, it's not looking so hot.

Let me just say, I was an honor roll student all the way through high school. And I took college level classes. But my grades have really gone down hill. I was put on probation for my New Century Scholarship last year and lost it-due to taking a semester off, not cuz of grades. I think I've lowered my standards. I've been kind of excited at my grades getting up to 79%-three of them now.

So I looked up a GPA calculator and typed in all my classes, credits, and grades... I am not even going to reveal on here how bad it is! It is pathetic. It truly is.

"BYU: Where your best is never good enough."