Bucket List

~Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.

~Danny Kaye

I have a bucket list. I love the idea of putting down a whole bunch of things I want to do in my life. And it's not like once I do all those things I can die... I will always be adding. I think it gives something to look forward to.

I've only done two things on my current bucket list. One was to see a shooting star :) I saw one this summer. I even wished on it. No, that wish didn't come true-but I've never really believed in wishes...

I thought I'd share some of the things on my bucket list!

~Buy something for the exact amount on a gift card (including tax)

~Dance in the rain in a nice dress

~Flush a whole roll of toilet paper

~Go surfing

~Ice skate on an actual pond

~Lay in an intersection and watch the lights change

~Ride in a taxi

~Write a message in cups on an overpass

~Ride in a hot air balloon

~Leave the country

~Publish a best-selling novel

I have a list of more than forty things... and even right now my mind is going through more things I can add :) It's kind of exciting!

King of Anything

SOOoooo... I've decided I'm sick of trying to find a topic and write all organized and crap on here. I guess I feel like I should-being an English major and all... but that's exactly why I shouldn't.

Yep, I need a place I can write how I want. I am sick of worrying what people think of me. And I honestly can't find a reason in the world that I should care. I just want to be myself-more than just in my journal. A journal that no one reads.

Think what you will. Say what you want. I'm gonna work on not caring. Because I think it will take work. I think the hardest thing to change is your thoughts. And when my thoughts are preoccupied with what other people's thoughts are there isn't room for me to really think.

So this is me declaring my new goal of being myself. I may not always be happy. I may complain. I'm not going to pretend something just so others are happy.

If you haven't heard the song "King of Anything" by Sarah Bareilles you should totally listen to it. I LOVE it. And I think it fits here.

School... Work... Whatever

~No man who worships education has got the best out of education.... Without a gentle contempt for education no man's education is complete.

~G.K. Chesterton

All right. I'm sad the long weekend is over, but I'm looking forward to the next few weeks :) And I am LOVING the snow. Granted, I don't like getting up twenty minutes earlier to scrape my car, slide all over the neighborhood (and when I'm not sliding I'm getting stuck :P), try to stay in the made-up lanes down the highway, and park in an unplowed parking lot...

But all that is just fine because the snow is beautiful and it's cold out and it's starting to feel like Christmas!!!

So I was thinking last week how much work is like school. Yes, I know they always told us this kind of thing in high school. No, I didn't really care. Like how we had to practice being on time to school. I kind of quit caring about that senior year... and the end of the semester in college... right now, I swear it's the snow that's making me late to work :)

Or how much I look forward to lunch and stretching breaks. Haha, and how I calculate all day how long I have until the next break or when I'm halfway through the day... both work wise and over all (including breaks). And yes, I may be able to get up to go get a drink or go to the bathroom... but it's still like I'm not supposed to what with my being "graded" (with a daily work percentage and everything) and all.

I have to wait for my bundle-handler to come by to ask for needles, thread, elastic, and bundles. I always have to have my tools... like the pen and paper in school, I need a pen, nippers, tweezers, and glasses. I have to keep my work area clean, do what my bundle-handler or supervisor says, and try not to disrupt anyone. And, if we get behind, we get to work over-time to make up for it.

I can't say I was ever excited to start working full-time after school. I also can't say I wanted to stay in school. And even though they seem very much alike (though, one I'm paying for and one is paying me :) ) I am kind of excited to go back to school next semester. For the record, I said "kind of"...

Dear Mr. President

~The world owes all its onward impulses to men ill at ease. The happy man inevitably confines himself within ancient limits.

~Nathaniel Hawthorne

Pretty sure my MP3 player has a mind of it's own. It goes through phases. Like playing all my church songs and young womens music in a row for ten songs... it can be too much. Or today when it played a song, played another, and went back to the one before... really? Haha, I have over 700 songs on there right now.

I haven't put any new music on in at least six weeks. Okay, except for Taylor Swift's new CD-which is AMAZING, by the way :) But for some reason there were all these songs this week that I haven't heard. Maybe I just don't pay attention. I don't know. About seven and a half hours of listening to music five days a week... you'd think I'd know every song on there by heart.

Well, there's this song I heard this week by Pink called "Dear Mr. President." It was very thought provoking, in my opinion. I've listened to it several times and actually ended up researching a little bit about it. According to a few cites and online articles it is in reference to President Bush. But honestly, I think it is just interesting to think about... particularly the first third or so.

I don't mean any disrespect to Bush and would like to say I think it can go for any president or king or anything of the like.

Road Rage?

~Anyone driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.

~Author Unknown

~Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.

~Mac McCleary

Sometimes I wonder how many people swear at me a day.

See, I try to go the speed limit. Ya, sometimes I go over :) But I am terrified of being pulled over so whenever I think about how a cop might see me, I slow down. Besides that there is the fact that construction on Bangerter Highway is ridiculous. As in, there is none. That being said, they have a million cones down the sides of the road and speed limit signs at 45 mph instead of 55 or 60.

There was one trip on the freeway when I was coming home from college for the weekend when I counted how many people sped around me. It was some crazy number I don't remember. And you can always tell when the person behind you is upset. They get really close and move back and forth a little in the lane. Sometimes I just laugh at them and estimate how long it will be until they swerve around me :) Very entertaining.

I watched a car for about half my drive to work the other morning. The kind of driver I could not be because my stress levels would skyrocket. They would swerve around someone, speed up to cover the space to the next car, break really hard again and again, drive really close the them until there was another opening, and do the same thing all over again. So annoying. And honestly, they got, like, three cars ahead of me after ten minutes. Haha, not worth it.

Anyway, I was driving the other day and remembered all the things I say to people who are being stupid on the road. Ya, I have a little bit of road rage. But until this week I'd never thought much of what others say about/to me. Haha, I kind of think it would be interesting it hear. Also, probably good that I don't :)

~The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

~Dave Barry

The Fellowship of the Unashamed

~If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance.

~Andrea Boydston

So, I was just thinking today of an email I got from my brother when he was on his mission. I had to look it up and read it through and felt it was appropriate for a Sunday post :)

There is apparently debate over who the author is-I found Elder Henry B. Eyring and Dr. Bob Moorehead.

The Fellowship of the Unashamed

I am a part of the fellowship of the unashamed. The dye has been cast. I have stepped over the line.
The Decision has been made.

I AM A DISCIPLE OF JESUS CHRIST.

I won't look back. let up, slow down. or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, and my future is secure. I'm finished and done with low living, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, worldly talking, cheap giving, and dwarfed goals. I no longer need pre-eminence, positions, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, recognized, praised, regarded or rewarded . I now live by Faith, lean on HIS presence, walk with patience. I am uplifted by prayer, and labor with power . My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is Heaven. My road is narrow, my way is is rough, my companions are few, my Guide is reliable, my mission is clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, divided, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the advesary, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity. I won't give up, shut up, or let up until I have stayed up, stored up, and paid up for the cause of Christ. I must go till he comes, give till I drop, preach till all know, and work till he stops me. And when He returnes for His Own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My Banner will be clear.

Remember when sick was fun...

~llness is the most heeded of doctors: to goodness and wisdom we only make promises; pain we obey. ~Marcel Proust

~If you do everything you should do, and do not do anything you should not do, you will, according to the best available statistics, live exactly eighteen hours longer than you would otherwise.

~Logain Clendening

Pretty sure I jinxed myself this week :) So, I'd been planning on calling in sick yesterday so I could go down to Provo and look at apartments and talk to the financial people at BYU about a whole bunch of stuff. But I felt really guilty about calling in sick when I wasn't really sick. Ya, people do it all the time or whatever other excuse but I don't think it's right. And I would have given notice but I wasn't sure what day I could go until two days before... and that didn't seem courteous either...

So, Tuesday at work I start to feel sick. Yep, I really got to call in sick Wednesday. I'm still sick today. And I don't think I have enough sick leave hours to call in sick tomorrow even if I need to. It's great fun. Haha, but at least I don't feel bad about lying to my supervisor...

Remember when being sick was fun? Alright, it wasn't fun to feel crappy. But I got to stay home from school and watch movies all day. I got to drink Sprite in bed or on the couch and request meals and snacks because not everything sounded good. My mom would pour me a bath and put blankets and pillows on the couch for me. And whoever was sick always got full rein of the couch. Besides, who wants to sit next to a sick person?

But yesterday I really went to Provo. Even though I didn't have to go to work, life goes on. There was a point in high school when it was no good being sick anymore. I'd lay at home watching the clock knowing I would have been in stats getting a two hour homework assignment or taking that test I'd have to make up or having a review session for the mid-term. And having to go back to everything you missed and being so behind was arguably worse than actually going to school.

And then I moved to college and I dreaded the day I'd get sick. Not only did I miss all kinds of "important" things in class but I also had no one to take care of me. True, the watching movies all day without a care thing ended long ago but I had to go to the store and buy my own medicine. There was no one there to pour me a bath or bring me ice cold Sprite or make grilled cheese sandwiches.

I never got very sick at college-which was a miracle when my roommate was sick several times. But it scared me because it would have been worse than just feeling crappy.

Anyway, it's also 11-11 today!!! Haha, and I actually walked into my room and looked at the clock this morning and it was 11:11!!! So, I made a wish :) Can't wait for 11:11 on 11-11-11...

Murphy's Laws

~A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself.

~Jessamyn West

So, I believe in Jinxing. It pretty much means that when you say something won't happen... it does. Or visa versa. Yes, I've gotten crap about how it's not real. But I just have to say, while it doesn't always happen... when something like that does, it was jinxed :)

It's kind of like irony-which I absolutely love, by the way. It's so fun to find irony in my own life and some days everything is so ironic it's funny. It makes life interesting, keeps me entertained.

The other day I came across a site of Murphy's Laws and had a lot of fun reading through them. There were a lot I'd heard a million times and some that didn't really sound like Murphy's Laws cuz I guess people could send them in. I'd recommend reading through some. But I picked some of my favorites :)

-No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

-The other line always moves faster.

-It is never in the last place you look. It is in the first place you look, but never discovered on the first attempt.

-Great ideas are never remembered and dumb statements are never forgotten.

-The clothes washer/dryer will only eat one of each pair of socks.

-If anything can go wrong, it will happen to the crankiest person.

-Paper is always strongest at the perforation.

-Window polishing: It's always on the other side.

-Behind every little problem there's a larger problem, waiting for the little problem to get out of the way.

-Whenever you cut your finger nails, you find a need for them an hour later.

-If the truth is in your favor no one will believe you.

-The more important it is to get to a website, the greater the chance the server is down.

And probably my favorite:

-In order to get a personal loan, you mush first prove you don't need it.

Sights and Smells

~When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving.

~Steven Wrigh

It's Friday!!! Hallelujah! AND I don't have to work tomorrow... but I think that's gonna come back to bite me cuz we are still behind and we're only not working cuz we don't have the material.

So, I was walking out of work today, passing another department, and all the sudden I started thinking about seventh grade gym. Random? Yes. Pretty sure someone was wearing a lot of body spray. Totally took me back to the cold, yellowed locker rooms at Elk Ridge and how much I hated that class... but the ten million scents of body spray happened at the end of class :)

I was just thinking how smells can take us back to our past. They're pretty powerful that way :) It's kind of like that song, "I Go Back" by Kenny Chesney:

"Cause everytime I hear that song....

I go back to the smell of an old gym floor

The taste of salt on the Carolina shore

After graduation and drinkin goodbye to friends

And I go back to watchin summer fade to fall

Growin up too fast and I do recall

Wishin time would stop right in its tracks

Everytime I hear that song, I go back, I go back"

Haha, this song actually reminds me of the last full day I worked at my first job :) They left the sound system on while we cleaned up-which wasn't normal-and I was walking around the field picking up stakes and cones and cords and fans (I worked for a carnival company!) and singing to the song-which I was usually embarrassed to do. Not that day.

It's kind of crazy to me how songs and smells and things have that kind of effect on us. How it starts to just smell like Christmas. Or you can't listen to a song when you're happy cuz it's one of the songs on your sad playlist. Or how the perfume I got from my mom smells like her. And I can remember the first time I heard most of my favorite songs. Ya, I'm not being very poetic about describing this today, but I hope I make my point :)

I'm sure excited for all the smells and sounds of Winter and Christmas. Even going back to school in January... I love the smell of newly sharpened pencils and new books. So glad I can see and smell and hear :)

Can't Wait for the Cold

~Women usually love what they buy, yet hate two-thirds of what is in their closets.

~Mignon McLaughlin

One post a month! Got on that early this month :P Just kidding, I want to blog more... just need to find a way to keep motivated after work.

Back in seventh grade I started riding the bus to school. I was so excited. Ya, it may seem a little weird but I was always so jealous of the kids who rode the bus in elementary school. They gathered in groups and talked and hung out the windows and it just looked like a party in there. I, on the other hand, walked out of school and across the field to find my mom's van. We car pooled sometimes, which was fun. And I guess a major upside was stopping for ice cream at Arctic Circle on the way home once a week.

Riding the bus was fun for a while. Then it got boring and routine. And then it got cold. I started waking up to frost on the windows and on the grass. I could see my breath the whole way around the block. It was cold-though I think I was hard-pressed to admit it to my parents. I liked just wearing a sweatshirt or jacket and I didn't have a coat... at least not one I liked. Pretty sure I still had the purple marshmallow from the year before but that wasn't cool anymore. Actually, probably never was :)

So my dad took me to Wal-Mart to look for a coat. I fought it. But when I saw the coat I got I knew I wanted it. It was plain black and longer. It wasn't puffy and didn't have a ginormous hood. Really, I'm not sure what was so great about it, but I liked it. I don't remember the reason but I had to convince my dad to get it. Maybe it was expensive. I don't know. But I promised him I would wear it more than one year. It wasn't like the marshmallow that I hardly wore for one winter-and maybe three months of it at that. I was pretty happy when we got it.

Well, that coat got me through last winter. In fact, it got me through seven winters. Some years I wore it more than others and I've had other coats that I wore occasionally. But that one lasted. Ya, it's worn out. And yes, there is a button missing on the sleeve. And yes, at the very end of last winter I discovered a long tear down the side of it. Now, I'm not trying to be dramatic... alright, not too dramatic. It's just a coat.

I bought a new coat yesterday! I'm pretty excited for it to get cold. As if I wasn't already :) It's not what I went to the store looking for but I like it better than what I had in mind.