My Small Pity Party

~To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.

~e.e. cummings

First day of church in my new ward! Haha, not really that exciting. We were fifteen minutes late... which I hate, but it wasn't too bad. There were enough seats on the back row when we got there.

Ah, and two of my roommates are sick. Fun fun. Everyone else is worried now. But this apartment is so much cleaner than last year! It's wonderful. So even though I get sick all the time seemingly, it shouldn't be too bad....

Anyway, I was thinking today how my emotions go all over when I'm away at college. Not terrible, just, my attitude changes all the time!

And then I remembered what a lot of people said in my student ward last year. We were all freshman and had just moved to BYU. They kept pointing out how they felt so average here. Because, not to sound prideful or anything but, we were supposed to be smart students.

Which, I guess I kind of used that as an excuse when I didn't get the best grades-because everyone else was supposed to be smart that it was okay if I wasn't as good as them.

And then I kind of feel insignificant. There are so many people here. Sometimes it's like I'm just another face in the crowd. Another name on a list. Another grade. Someone taking up space... Haha, this sounds a little depressing.

I had a little bit of a pity party for myself for a minute in church.

But this year is gonna be better than last year. I'm sure of it :)